Kelvin Pichardo is not your freaking charity case, man.

New PawSox-type guy Kelvin Pichardo is a 24-year-old righty who, so far, has not pitched above double-A.

Here we go!
1. Pichardo was Giants property when he was suspended 50 games for PEDs. He was on their 40-man roster when it happened.
2. There's a possibility that I saw him pitch with the Connecticut Defenders!
3. Oooh, Pawtucket tie-in: Although Pichardo was originally signed by the Phillies, he was traded to San Francisco for OF Michael Tucker in 2005. Tucker was a PawSox guy in 2007!
4. Pichardo has "a very live arm with huge potential".
5. Please enjoy Pichardo's '07-08 stats. They look like Greek to me.
6. From June 2008: "Pichardo has a big arm that he uses to run fastballs into the mid-90’s and a curveball that can be a plus pitch for him at times. He blew through the lower levels of S-K, Augusta, and San Jose before making it to AA Connecticut in the second half of the ‘07 season. He struggled with control, walking 16 hitters in 21 innings and the Giants left him at AA to start this year. He’s still had some control problems this year — BB% of 12% — and his K% has dropped to 18.8% when it was at a ridiculous 36% in San Jose." (Bay City Ball)
7. Kelvin Pichardo is thickish. Watch him pitch in the AFL here!
8. "San Francisco submit pitcher Kelvin Pichardo on the 60-Day DL with a fortifying spread." Mmmmm... fortifying spread.
9. Picho is the man!
10. When Pichardo returned from his drug suspension, the Giants DFA'd Patrick Misch to open up a roster spot for him. They must have wanted to hang onto Pichardo a little bit, right?
11. Well... about a month later, Pichardo was on the 60-day DL with a right shoulder strain. After that, he was outrighted to the minors and released in November 2009. He is "hoping to be ready for spring training".
12. MLB held Pichardo out of winter ball due to "extreme fatigue". I don't know, maybe your Spanish is better than mine.

A lot of the stuff I found on Pichardo was related to his suspension. I am willing to overlook that and accept him as a Red Sox bullpen member. Also, as a side note, I like getting my information from blogs rather than established news sources.

That's not to say that many blogs aren't established news sources. Furthermore, I avoid local Boston-area Red sox fan blogs and try to get an outsider's perspective.

Coming soon: Ray Chang! He was born ready. He's Ray Fucking Chang.