Ryan Rowland-Smith's apartment looks upside-down from there.

Ryan Rowland-Smith is not Peter Moylan. I just now realized that because I was all, isn't that the dude on the Braves with all the tattoos?

No, it's that cute guy from the Mariners. But they are both Australian so partial credit.

Rowland-Smith, or Smitty, as he likes to be called, is a lefty who spent last year pitching for the Iowa Cubs. Rowland-Smith started eight games, but was primarily used in a relief role. He went 3-6 with a 3.94 ERA, if you're into generic corporate conformist stats, you Fascist!

Jelly up and jam tight!
1. Rowland-Smith struggled pretty much the entire season with the Mariners in 2010: "What I learned after last season is not to live and die off every game. I'm talking about when I struggle in a game, not to take four days to get over it, and trust that ability-wise, it's all there. I realized how much I lost my ability to compete. I stopped being myself - a guy who goes out and fights for every out, a f#%k you attitude, not a guy who tries to trick guys. There's a huge difference in hoping that a ball misses a bat, and believing it's going to miss the bat." And then he went to the Astros. Check out Jeff Sullivan's entire interview, it's ace!

2. Rowland-Smith enjoys the sinker, dogs, and being Australian.

3. Hey, Aardsma! Say hi to your mom for me!

4. "if u spent 24 hrs with me maybe u would see something different than your perception of me. I know your pulling for me, when I get through this struggle I will acknowledge (every) single person who stood by me and believed in me. No matter what happens, we have to keep grinding, and it will happen soon." - Rowland-Smith is one classy dude.

I'm out of time. Rats! I think Rowland-Smith is going to a problem for me in Pawtucket. Let's face it: He's stupid hot. I often complained about the lack of handsomeness in Pawtucket but maybe it's better that way. It's tough to be professional when you're squishy.